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I wake up and canrsquo;t speak. I can hardly even whisper. I try and try but no sound comes out. Irsquo;m in Chicago at Angiersquo;s grandparentsrsquo; house. Itrsquo;s the day of our performance at Second City on the main stage and I have lost my voice. I donrsquo;t know what to do. This is horrible, but I know Irsquo;ll figure it out.

Angie helps me to explain my condition to Shenoah and Mark. All through the morningrsquo;s rehearsals I do not make a sound. I just drink bottle after bottle of water and know that I will be able to speak when I need to. We walk in a group to the main stage. Itrsquo;s awe-inspiring. Standing on the stage that Tina Fey, John Belushi, Chris Farley, Amy Sedaris, Rachel Dratch, and so many others have is possibly the coolest thing Irsquo;ve ever done. Backstage is a small, colorful greenroom filled with chairs, shelves, and photos. Quotes are written all over the walls. This is fantastic.

During the quick dress rehearsal I do not speak. While the audience fills in and we huddle in the tiny wings, I drink water and I prepare myself, prepare my voice. Just before the show starts I finally test it. I make a soft scratchy noise and thatrsquo;s all the confidence I get. When the showrsquo;s over, my voice is nowhere to be heard and I am cursed to silence again.

(August 5, 2006)

And now itrsquo;s time to go onstage for the first scene in which I have to speak. I am nervous, but Irsquo;m just going to have to make it work. I donrsquo;t know whatrsquo;ll happen if my voice doesnrsquo;t come through for me. Zach will have to find a way to cover for it. Wersquo;ll have to improvise a totally new scene. Irsquo;m pretty confident that we could do it, but we wonrsquo;t have to. I will speak. I just will. I take one more swig of water, clear my throat, and walk onstage into the bright hot lights.
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And I speak. I speak loud and clear. I donrsquo;t even sound like Irsquo;m sick. And it lasts through the entire show. And that is the amazing, undeniable magic of the stage.
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